Hayden’s latest thing is when we are telling him off or that he can’t do something that he wants he will tell us “don’t say that word”. It might be something like we will tell him “if you don’t eat your dinner you can’t have your cup cake”, or “if you don’t do a poop before bed you can’t have two books at bed time”, anything really he doesn’t like and he’ll just tell us “don’t say that word!”
I think I am a pretty good driver. Generally I drive close to the speed limit and think I am very aware of other drivers and people around the roads. However I have a habit of looking around and being what I am going to call observant. Often that involves sitting at the traffic lights and not noticing they have changed. Well I think this might have been inherited by Hayden! He has been learning to ride his bike recently and he is a doing a great job but from time to time his mind will just drift off into the distant and he will pay zero attention to where he is headed! He will just veer off into the grass or be heading towards a lamppost with no care in the world. I’ll obviously warm him and tell him that he needs to pay attention to where he is going. Kara thinks this is ironic. 🙂
Recently Hayden has gotten into negotiating. He is just missing a couple of basic skills. Like which way to negotiate and he nearly always goes the wrong way. This often comes into play at dinner or lunch time. We will want him to finish his food and he will tell us that he is all done and that he is ready for ice cream or some other cool treat. We will tell him that he needs to est more food before and so starts the negotiation process. Often we will start and tell him that he needs to take say 4 more bites. He will counter with 6, we will go, ok 6 and then he will respond “so 8?” . We agree and he ends up finishing his food! Yesterday Kara said he got up to like 16, and fundamentally lost count so again just ate everything! I am sure he will get better at this but right now mummy and a daddy are winning this battle!
Layla had six teeth for the longest time. This was a little different for us because with Hayden they just seem to all burst through at once. If you go back to pictures of Hayden around the age that Layla is now you will notice that he always seems to have a bib on! He was a drool monster! We don’t seem to have that problem with Lay, she is a one tooth at a time girl. The bad of that is that is prolonging the teething process, the good thing is I don’t think it hurts or bothers her as much and also she doesn’t have to have bibs every picture….only when she eats! and that is pretty normal, I think grandpa still wears bibs and he is just a little bit older than Lay!
However six teeth has suddenly turned into like 12 without hardly noticing. From nowhere they just popped through after it feels like 3 months of 6 teeth. I can’t call her 6 teeth anymore – I will have to come up with a new nickname for her now! Maybe “Princess Boo!”
Layla is a eating machine. There is no other way about it. She eats everything. If you take your eyes off your plate – then swipe – it’ll be gone!
Hayden has gotten into the habit rerecently of asking “why?” for basically everything we say to him. It takes me back a few years because about two years ago his cousin Robby used to do exactly the same. It’s always hard to answer these questions. An example:
Hayden we need to go to pre school
Because that is what you do on Mondays.
Because its a mummy and daddy work day
Because we need to work to buy you toys
Because otherwise you would not have any toys
By this time I have grey hair and very little hair… got to love four year olds!
Hayden is a really good big brother. He shares toys with Layla. He shows a general interest in her well being. Tries to make her laugh, etc. As I’ve mentioned many times in this blog he is also a big daddy’s boy. Well he does not want Layla to become a daddy’s girl!
If I show attention or affection to Layla he will immediately demand that I pay him the same attention. If I pick Layla up then Hayden will suddenly urgently need picking up too. “put Layla down and pick me up daddy”. A fit will ensue if I don’t oblige.
At night time I’ve started to put Layla to bed. This has also not gone down well with the little fella. “do me daddy, you need to do me, why are you doing Layla and not me”. So I’ve got accustomed to getting Layla to sleep quickly while I tell Hayden to play trains while he waits his turn. This works ok because I think trains are even higher in the Hayden totem pole than I am. Although some times eh will come into Layla’s room while I am trying to get her to sleep and make up some excuse just because he wants to make sure he is not missing out.
He has little elements of jealousy around toys and food. If Layla has something he suddenly wants it. I think that is the same as every child in the world. I guess I am just a really good toy!
Hayden is four! I almost typed finally four – in fact Kara was saying just the other day that she can’t believe that our little boy is four already, and my response is that I can’t believe he isn’t four already – we’ve been talking about his birthday since Christmas!! He has been so excited about it that it’s been “when I’m four …” and “for my birthday” etc, that it seems like it’s been a bit of a build up to the big day!! I can certainly remember back before May when we were laying out the sequence of birthdays so he knew where his fell. Also he knew in line with coming back from England it was his birthday. He just missed the bit that said there was going to be three weeks in between coming back and his actual birthday!
We were going to just do a low key birthday, but of course Hayden had other ideas and basically planned his own birthday party at Chuckie Cheese, with a cake and presents… so you’ll hear more about that later I’m sure.
Three was an interesting year for Hayden. He was a really good two year old, but when he hit three, he certainly become a but of a threeager. He started to question why he had to do things, rather than just doing them. Started to learn the power of the tantrum in public and realize that while threats of having toys taken away wasn’t great, it wasn’t enough to sway whatever his particular argument was at the time. He also become a big daddy’s boy, to the point though that it’s a bit ridiculous at times, and certainly hard on Layla and Kara. Small example would be if I’m there, Hayden won’t let anyone else but me put him in and out of his car seat. If it’s just me and Layla, then he’ll throw a fit if I try to do anything with Layla first. If I carry Layla he will suddenly need carrying. If I play with Layla, he will get himself in between us and insist I play with him. So he certainly became pretty testy. Certainly his relationship with Kara has gone under some good test as he loves to push her buttons and draw out her patience! Luckily for him she has plenty!!
Of course, all of that is always instantly forgotten because he is also the sweetest and funniest little boy. He gives out hugs and kisses. He loves being tickled and just loves any play time with me or Kara. In fact I think he just loves attention. More than anything of course he loves Trains. His obsession about trains bleeds into everything he does, but it’s a healthy obsession as things like that go, and he gets so much joy out of just pushing his trains around we just leave him to it.
He still loves his routines. Two books at bed time is just as important now as it’s every been. He gets very upset if he can’t get his books, or songs, or even his bath. These are the things he does, and he wants to know why if things are going to change.
I couldn’t imagine life without my little guy and can’t believe how fast he is growing. But it is so much fun watching him grow up. Love you Hayden!!
Can I Cry? August 25, 2011
Hayden does not like thunderstorms. In particular, he does not like to be woken up by lightning and thunder. We can get some pretty strong thunder storms in Indiana, and as it happens many of them pass through after he has gone to bed. When he is awoken by thunder and lightning he will start crying, and John or I will go into his room to try to comfort him. John likes to tell him the clouds are having a party. I usually talk about how he is safe, his room is in a really protected part of the house, and I try to think of something that might make it less scary, like last night I put his quilt over his head and asked if he felt safer if he couldn’t see the lightning. Usually, we just have to spend some time with him and he feels better. But, naturally, he doesn’t want us to leave even once he has calmed down, so when we tell him we need to go back to our bed he will ask, “Can I cry?” Bless his little heart. We tell him of course he can cry if that makes him feel better, but we ask him to try to do it quietly so it doesn’t wake up Layla (otherwise he can really get wailing pretty loudly). It is just so sweet how he will not be crying and he will ask us if it is ok to start, like he has it all planned out.
This asking permission to cry thing also sometimes works when we are out. There have been times when he has been on the verge of throwing a fit but I’ve asked him to just wait until we get home and then he can throw a big fit once we are there. So now sometimes if he is unhappy about something when we are out he will pout about it and tell me that he wants to throw a fit when we get home.
Back to the storm – Layla is a pretty light sleeper, generally. It seems like the slightest noises can wake her up. Unless there is a huge storm with lightning and really loud thunder, in which case she will sleep soundly. The only thing that really wakes her up in that scenario is Hayden crying. Last night we had an incredibly loud storm come through. The thunder and rain were so loud that even when John or I weren’t in Hayden’s room trying to comfort him it was still hard to sleep through it. But we didn’t hear a sound from Layla all night. Peculiar.