We went through a phase for a while where we’d put the kids to bed and they’d get up several times before falling asleep, needing to go potty or have a drink or tell us something – typical stall tactics. I’ve been able to reign this in quite a bit recently, and it’s now not unusual for them to stay in bed once put down (Hayden is particularly fantastic at this anymore – although he does take try it on with John pretty regularly). One thing that has helped with Layla is my monster and dinosaur spray. Every night for the last couple of months I have “sprayed” all around her bed with my two sprays. Even though we can’t see the spray, it has kept all the monsters and dinosaurs away while she is sleeping. Every night we spray (sometimes she has to come out of her room to tell me I forgot to spray!), and every night while I’m spraying she asks me if it will “last all day night”.
Another silly thing we are doing is pretending the food that she hasn’t eaten wants to go into her belly to see its friends who she has already eaten. She’ll be eating, say, cereal and leave half a bowl. I’ll scoop up some on a spoon and put on a funny voice to ask her to please let me in so I can go see my friend/mommy/daddy/sister/brother/cousin. Today she was even having me give each spoonful a name (rejecting most of the names until I got to the ones she liked). It can certainly slow down a meal, but it’s worth it to know she’s had a good amount of food, and over time it seems to have gotten her to start off eating a good amount on her own before I have to do the show.
Layla is traditionally more independent than Hayden was at her age (or would like to be now, if we didn’t push him to do things for himself). I’m sure being the little sister has a lot to do with it – seeing her big brother doing things and she wants to do them for herself, too. For instance, we are currently trying to help Hayden learn how to bathe himself. We have to talk him through what to do in what order, and Layla just follows right along as we tell Hayden what it’s time to do next.
We’re thinking Hayden is in the midst of a growth spurt, but it’s hard to see the outcome of that when you see him every day. As I’m sure has been a blog topic in the past, he is a picky eater. However, when we went to England he was chowing down! Surprisingly, it was really easy to find food that he liked. Layla on the other hand, not overly impressed. She used to be such a great eater, but has been getting pickier the last few months and was particularly picky in England. Of course, she had a nasty ear infection while we were there, was subsequently on antibiotics, and might have had a short stomach bug as well – so none of that is going to help the appetite.
John or I have probably posted before that Hayden likes to tell us to watch him do things. Most often it is when he is eating, oddly enough. It’s usually when he is going to eat something he is excited about, like dessert. “Watch me!” (Big bite) Well, now Layla has taken a page from her big bro’s book, and she will say, “Washie” while she is eating. Last night she was eating chicken soup with pasta shapes. She had this huge spoonful of pasta, and she said, “Mama, washie!” So I laughed and told her I was watching, and she looked across at Hayden and said, “Haddie, washie!”
Hayden, like all kids, doesn’t always want to eat what he’s given, particularly the healthy stuff. So John and I like to remind him that the healthy stuff is good because it makes him grow faster. He loves to talk about how tall he will be when he’s older and when he’ll be taller than Daddy. So when he’s eating he will ask if he is growing taller because he is eating something healthy. He will also say that he doesn’t want to grow taller when he really just doesn’t want to eat something that is good for him. Some days he is ok with not being taller because he really cannot be asked to eat those carrots! Similarly, we are doing a sticker chart right now, and there are certain things he can do to earn a sticker which will earn him a prize once the sticker chart is filled out, such as putting shoes on the first time he’s asked, putting his clothes on himself, and taking his dirty dishes to the sink. (He actually asked for the sticker chart himself when some stickers came in the mail.) He was really into the sticker chart at first, but now when he needs to do something for which he would earn a sticker he will just tell us he doesn’t want to do it because he doesn’t want a sticker. In fact, yesterday he told John he didn’t want to put his pajamas on himself because he didn’t want a sticker. He ended up putting them on, but he didn’t want the sticker… Four year olds can be complicated creatures!
Further to my previous post, not only does Hayden know what Layla wants, but Layla herself is a girl who knows what she wants. A couple of easy examples of this are BOOTS and SLEEVES.
Hayden is mostly a pretty good brother. I mean, he definitely has his moments where I would regret making that claim, but all in all he is pretty good. One thing I really enjoy is that he tries to translate Layla’s words or actions for us. For instance, she has gotten really bad about sitting for a meal at lunch or dinner – whether at home or out. The other day I was doing everything I could to try to keep her at the table, and she wasn’t liking it. She wouldn’t eat and she was getting pretty fussy. Hayden said, “I don’t think she likes her food.” Often when she is getting upset while eating, I of course know that she doesn’t want to eat what is on her plate but like every other parent on the planet don’t want to give in right away and make her think she only has to eat the super delicious things, Hayden will chime in telling me he thinks she wants [fill in food here]. What’s funny is it’s not always things that she would be excited about eating, but if he suggests it and then I ask if that’s what she wants she’ll stop crying and say yes, and then eat it. Note to self, get him to start suggesting broccoli.
We have had to change up a few things to accommodate Layla’s eating. She’s become a little high maintenance lately in this arena. She eats fruit very well, and we had gotten in the habit of filling her plate mostly with fruit, with some sort of main entree. Soon, she would eat up all her fruit and not touch the main entree (you know, the part that is supposed to fill her up). Now we are feeding her as much as we can find that is healthy but not fruit, and she can have her fruit at the end. That kind of worked for a short time, but now I am finding she eats a tiny bit of her meal and hands her plate over to say she is done. So, we are currently weighing whether it is better to get her used to just eating what is given with fruit as a dessert if she eats enough of her other stuff, or if she should have some fruit which she will definitely eat even if she doesn’t eat her other stuff, in hopes she will stay a little fuller a little longer through the night. She keeps waking at 6 am every morning, and we think it’s mainly because she is hungry. She’s just not old enough yet to reason with (“eat this stuff so I can give you what you really want”).
Hayden and Layla's Place 